Sunday, June 29, 2008

I keep day dreaming about London. Strawberry lagers, European history, traveling around, improving my British accent... I just hope it all works out. (Let's hope some of my scholarships come through.)

Matt and I have discussed the possibility of separating while I'm abroad. The idea is nauseating. We have a state of the art support system for ourselves. It's hard to just let that go. Perspective will aid in our relationship, I know it in my brain. I just can't stomach it.

Perhaps more later on the latter... perhaps not? One thing is certain, can't wait for the Fall!!! I'm excited to be in the house with three awesome girls, our cat, and a peach tree.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Today I went swimming with Julie in my new swim suit bottoms. That was fun but now I'm a bit sun burned, as usual. It's the Eastern European Jew in me. The freckles come from the blasted German Lutherans. I suppose I was born to be a pale. One summer I intend to accept that.

I am afraid Calc. has the potential to butcher my winning streak... oh well, I kind of like the class for some unknown reason. The type of thinking used is not static algebra but variables in motion, to picture that is very abstract and interesting. I don't pretend to be good at the process, just mildly entertained.

Thursday, June 19, 2008


I am going to London in the Spring!

Well, there is about an 85% chance.

Jolly Good!

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Weird Dreams

I keep having dreams of infidelity. Maybe I shouldn't post that on my blog. I told Matt and he is not angry that I cheat on him in my dreams. Sometimes its reverse and he cheats on me.

Freud, what's wrong with me?

-Another Jewish Case Study

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Wanderer Above the Sea of Fog

We studied this painting while discussing Kant's concept of the sublime. A sense of majesty understood through reason and thus mastered, how enchanting is that scene? I wish I could trade places with him. After reading Wordsworth I wonder if Missouri can inspire the same sense of ecstasy with nature experienced by the Romantics. I suppose there have been times when I've felt crippled by the beauty of a Kansas City sky, however I feel like what Casper David Friedrich was experiencing in this image, is so much greater, something I've never understood.

All of this makes me wonder if I have been missing something, something essential. How would the fulfillment of this x value flavor the syntax in which I view life, art, and all the other topics that pop into my malleable mind? This painting evokes void in my heart instead of the glorious sublime. Void and jealousy. And although I fear this post sounds pretentious, as so many of my writings do, I have to emit my feelings. Thus, this post.

Incomplete Story

There was something catching about the way her hair spilled over the grass. The careless tangles, split ends, the occasional brilliant curl contrasted with stick straight locks of brown, all summing up a careless beauty vacant in her awkward features. He noticed she wasn’t beautiful; her lips were to thin, her elbows to dry, hazel eyes bright but not charming. And yet, her hair was to beautiful for her to be ugly. The brunette sat up, covered in grass. “What is it about a cemetery that makes you feel so alive?” inquired she, dancing nimble fingers along a sepulcher while passing it. The boy watched her. He knew she had said that to sound poetic, and said so. Indignant she cried, “nothing of the sort” and ran along, red dress floating with her, feeling quixotic and beautiful, as if she were Holly Golightly, yet the boy saw no resemblance.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

New Layout

Like my new blog duds? I do.

Subtle and classy, everything I daily strive to be!

Hmm.. I really do come off like a pretentious ass sometimes. Trust me, it's not on purpose.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Good Day

Today was a good day. I babysat that cutest baby in existence, worked out, found out the math I'm taking is worth 5 credits AND comes with friends. (or at least old acquaintances) Plus, a tornado siren interrupted everything and we got to go home early. (Albeit the drive was dangerous.) Moreover, the teacher literally called the class "watered down Calculus." It doesn't get much better then that.

Other exciting news? Well, I am probably switching my Theatre major into Philosophy and Religion. I dropped stagecraft and theatre practice and will probably drop Hist and Lit I. Let me say that dropping the above wasn't like throwing off clothes to jump into a pool. The decision was/still is hard.

I don't know... sorry, I just got really sick of blogging.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

telephone wires

She drove an unnoteworthy distance,
in the backseat of a car.
Her eyes followed the telephone wires,
that for her, formed musical bars.
A poem was stuck in her head,
the words: incomplete,
they were weightless and simple
yet still, inevitably concrete.